What if?

      I believe, things should never be kept unsaid. What if, those words that were kept unsaid, could've change the world? What if, you took your risk and said it?
        We often hear people say, live life with no regrets. Yeah sure. Everyone can say that, but do they have what it takes to make it happen? It takes guts. Sometimes, actions speak louder than words. You can say whatever you want, but can you really do it? Most importantly, what if you don't do it? Then it'd be a huge loss. The world, is so much bigger than you can see it now.
          You don't want to spend your whole life letting the word what if haunt every single thought that came across your mind. Live your life to the fullest. Take every second, every chance you have to make it a life you'll never regret.
           What if colors were just colors? I guess you had to use all the colors then you'll know. What if we were able to visit all the amazing regions in the country without fear? Then, have no fear. Let curiosity overcome fear. Just don't let the curiosity kill the cat. What if we didn't pretend to be proud of our country? Tell them how you really feel then. What if we had more hopes? Start making hopes. What if we were more honest? Everyone has somethings to lie about.Why don't be the different one? What if we were just happier?  Take every chance you had, do everything that you want to, then you'll never be as happier as ever. What if things changed? Sometimes, the more things change, the more they stays the same. If it's not, then there's something waiting for you in the end.

          True love. If you had it once. Then it's never lost. If it's true then, why wouldn't it be true now? You should go and find it. Get it back. Life. Decisions are made. Spending countless hours, sleepless nights, trying to decide. You think you've made the right decisions, which is following what your mind think it's right but your heart says otherwise. You refuse to follow your heart because people say it's a crazy thing to do. So what if it's a crazy thing? It's worth trying.Sometimes, the heart knows better than the mind.

What was ours.

      In music, I learnt a word. Tutti. It means , everyone. It's when everyone plays their part at the same time. And that's when your heart dance along with the music. I never like playing music alone, because it sounds lonely. But when the violins, brass and woodwind joins, now that's what I call a party. It's like you're connecting with everyone, but without words. The sound of violins, clarinets, flutes, cello and viola makes it a whole new world of joy. How jolly that moment is.
      Just like, in life. Home is the stage, and everyone else is the instruments that colors the stage with their music and makes it a beautiful moment. That tiny little moment , when everyone is there. Making jokes, hearing laughter  , make the world doesn't look as bad as it is.
      I had that moment. But I couldn't remember when was it. I still remember pieces of it though. I look outside my window, watching the leaves dancing on the trees, birds making love songs, bees buzzing here and there and watching wild plants growing higher and higher covering the house. The house was once mine. Mine, yours and ours. I closed my eyes, I can start to hear rain falling, slapping on the ground, I let all the background noises disappear as the sound of the rain that getting heavier. I took a long breath and everything was coming back to me.
      I remembered, it was holidays. Everyone was there. Including Aki. He's the spirit of the family. Has always been. We were eating, it was a family fest. We were about to go outside to play when the rain started to fall. So we stayed inside , trying to warm ourselves with a bowl of soup. I remembered he told us about his mother and father. About the war. He told us about how he met my grandmother. The house would always filled with laughter when he's around. I can still smile remembering it all. The sound of thunder, took away the memory, I opened my eyes, and there it is. The house. It was once ours. I've always wonder for how long it's gonna be ours, or before the house is gone, eaten by the age.
     But I never expected it being sold to anyone else. It's our house. It's where all of our memories are kept. Or it was. Look at it now, it's just being ripped apart. There're holes, in the wall. I could see the living room where the whole family used to sleep in when the whole village was blacked out. I saw the little me running around with the cousins. I wish I could just stop growing there.  At least, I'd still have more time with Aki.
     Watching the workers, taking off the walls, is like, watching my heart, is being taken pieces by pieces. Wish I nothing had change. But hey, one way or another, it'll still change.

Slow Dance.

Have you ever watched kids, 
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain,
Slapping on the ground?


Ever followed a
butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?


You better slow down,
Don't dance so fast,
Time is short,
The music wont last.


Do you run through each day,
On the fly?


When you ask How are you?
Do you hear a reply?


When the day is done,
Do you lie on your bed,
With the next hundred chores,
Running through your head?


You'd better slow down,
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short,
The music wont last.


Ever lost touch?
Let a good friendship die
Because you never had time
To call and say Hi


When you ran so fast to get somewhere,
You miss half of the fun getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It's like an unopened gift.


Thrown away,
Life is not a race,
Do take it slower, 
Hear the music,
Before the song is over.



December 30th, 2010.

2.25 A.M.

    

Gardyloo!

    Life's never boring. It's just people who chose to be boring. Amy always says I'm crazy. And I told him I'm  normal. I believe those who aren't crazy aren't normal. Because , if everyone's being sane, then who's gonna color the world , if it not the insane ones. Insanity is what keeps life an adventure. Imaginations are added to make it more adventurous. Half of those who are reading this, are going to say it's nonsense. Well, most of the time , I couldn't even understand what I said. But it still  makes sense somehow.
   I like nonsense. It wakes up the brain cell. You people think science can explain everything because it makes sense and things that doesn't make sense are non sense. It doesn't have to be that way. There're always answers to everything. You'd probably say , ''But, what about the unanswered questions?'' . It's answered because you haven't found a way to answer it. Experience have answers to everything and you can never have enough experience that is why you don't have the answers.
   Life's short. True. But what makes it shorter is people waste their time doing what everybody else is doing. You'd probably disagree with me, and say, no. You're living your life. But is it true? Are you, really? How? By doing the same thing as everyone else is? Think again.
   There're always new thinhen gs to be learnt. To be seen. There're things waiting to be explored. There're always something new about the world. Nature's secret. Everything on this earth, from the biggest nature to the smallest, have it's use.  We're living in the century where people think , everything has been discovered. But it's not. One thing that fascinates me about the world and it's nature, is,  there're a lot of thing hidden. Things that we can never think of. Things beyond our imaginations.
   Theories are made, but are they really true? They are made because logically , they made sense. But, have you seen it for real? What if, it's the other way around? And the other way around, is what the theorists think , it doesn't make sense? You see, life's never boring. It's the people who make it boring. When you try something that never cross others mind, they say you're crazy. Doesn't mean , it never cross their mind, it makes you insane because it cross yours. Or maybe I am insane , for trying something that never cross anyone's mind. So, what if I'm insane for that? Let 'em call me that. At least I wouldn't be saying life is bored because I'm too scared to be brave and explore this life. Call me insane, kooky, lunatic, bonkers. But all the best people are. 


I write nonsense, not theories.